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Discussion in 'V.C.'s Parlor' started by banjaxed, Feb 18, 2017.
Since she's an actress, you could maybe assume the character she was playing is a blonde, if you wanted.
This is gross!
Hey, I just noticed something....Large breast women have eyes.
Here is my contribution to societal enlightenment. Gotta love the '60s! Unless....OK, don't gotta love it but what a historic decade.
Which one of these guys is enjoying this ride the most ???
Stole this one off of facebook
just stole it from you
Well thanks Papa, the bleach my eyes need to cleanse that picture doesn't exist.
A Priest, a school teacher, and an engineer were on trial and set to be sent to the guillotine next morning.
Morning came around as people gathered round the grisly site.
First up was the Priest...The blade man says to him "Since you are a man of God, I will let you choose whether to lie face down or face up to meet your fate...
The Priest quickly replied " I will lie face up so that my soul will rise to the heavens."
The blade man says "Very well" as the Priest lies down facing the sky. The blade man pulls the lanyard and the blade falls only to stop inches from its gory end. The blade man says "Must be an act of God, you may go free."
Next the school teacher asks that he may look up too and the blade man says "Sure, why not?"
The blade falls and again inches from its end it stops. The blade man also sets the teacher free..
When the engineer approached, the blade man says "I guess you want to face upwards as well."
The engineer obliges and lies down. Just before the blade man pulled the lanyard, the engineer remarks
"Hey wait a minute, I see the problem with your blade, I can fix that."
People these days don't know the meaning of hospitality. I went to a friend's house and they said "make yourself at home" and then got mad at me for peeing in the kitchen sink.
A fisherman man was stopped by a game warden recently with two ice chests full of live fish in the water. He was
leaving a river well known for its fishing.
The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
"Naw, my friend, I ain't got no license. These here are my pet fish."
"Yep. Every night I take these fish down to the river and let 'em swim
around for a while. Then I whistle and they jump right back into this
ice chest and I take 'em home."
"That's a bunch of BS! Fish can't do that!"
The man looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, "It's the
truth. I'll show you. It really works."
"Okay, I've GOT to see this!"
The man poured the fish into the river and stood and waited. After
several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, "Well?"
"Well, what?" said the man.
"When are you going to call them back?"
"Call who back?"
LOL the wife loved that one....^^^
Sure glad I have the Kensington Washable keyboard..Spit coffee all over it..
What do you get when you breed a beaver and a rhinoceros...?
You guys and gals might already know this one, but let's post it anyway in case somebody hasn't read it yet.
" A doctor, a politician, a priest and a little boy are on board a plane. Suddenly, the plane flies through a terrible storm and one of the engines is struck by lightning. The pilot tells them to put on their parachutes in case they have to jump out of the plane.
Unfortunately, there are only three parachutes remaining.
The doctor grabs one and says, "I'm a doctor, I save lives, so I must live," and jumps out.
The politician then says, "I'm a politician and I believe that politicians usually are the smartest people in the world. Therefore I deserve to live."
He also grabs a parachute and jumps.
The priest looks at the little boy and says, "My son, I've lived a long and full life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Take the last parachute and live in peace."
The little boy hands the parachute back to the priest and says, "Not to worry, Father. The 'smartest man in the world' has just taken off with my backpack."
That parody article from humorous site 'thehardtimes.net' made me laugh:
"Man Who's Bad at Accepting Compliments Joins Friend's Band In Order to Avoid Them.
LAFAYETTE, La. — Local guitarist and misanthrope Jeremy Waggoner joined his friend’s band Punted Child earlier this month to avoid any possibility of ever receiving a compliment, Waggoner’s psychiatrist confirmed."
The rest of the story is here: