EVER THOUGHT ABOUT QUITTING?

Discussion in 'V.C.'s Parlor' started by Tconroy, Sep 10, 2019.

  1. Tconroy

    Tconroy Squier-Nut

    Age:
    60
    795
    Sep 11, 2015
    kansas city mo
    Seems like ever since I hurt my middle finger I am having trouble playing and lately havent been able to play well at all. I go to make a simply E chord and my middle finger wants to lay on top of my ring finger. Seems like I have no control over it. The doctor says its not broke but if feels bent and when I make a fist its hangs more to my ring finger kinda pushing on it. I am also getting real frustrated with my playing and have thought about just getting out of playing totally. It seems like I am just wasting hours of my time. I will never play in front of anyone because of my severe stage fright and my wife says she is tired of hearing the same songs over and over. When we were at the Rock and Roll hall of fame she was trying to get me to get up and play and said this is your last chance chicken! and I developed such anxiety I thought I was having a heart attack!! She got mad and walked off cause I wouldn't play. At that point I just wanted to leave and sell all my stuff and not play ever again! I didnt play for a week after that and then would only play with my headphones on. I have lost all my confidence and interest.. Maybe I just need a long break. Anyway thanks for reading.
     
    rorygman, Robb, SquierTap and 12 others like this.
  2. strat_strummer

    strat_strummer Squier-holic

    Age:
    57
    Nov 24, 2018
    Grouse hunting
    I would check into some physical therapy.
     
  3. so1om

    so1om Dr. Squier

    Age:
    51
    Feb 10, 2010
    Chicago
    only my job. every. day.
     
  4. drewcp

    drewcp Squier-holic

    Age:
    35
    Dec 14, 2018
    Saint Paul, MN
    Wow, that's rough. Sorry to hear that you're dealing with all of that.

    I've definitely felt like giving up on playing more than a few times. I think @Lonn said recently that he was looking at other hobbies instead of guitars.

    Nothing wrong in taking an extended break. If you come back to it and that finger is still an issue, you could always "start over" and learn how to adapt and play differently.
     
  5. DaveDrums

    DaveDrums Squier-Nut

    988
    Feb 2, 2017
    MA, USA
    Sorry to hear it.

    I’d suggest an open mic in front of sloppy drunks to get your confidence back. My friends who play them have played the same songs at the same place(s) for something like 15 years now. Also, the audience for the most part have no clue when/if you mess up.
     
  6. DaveDrums

    DaveDrums Squier-Nut

    988
    Feb 2, 2017
    MA, USA
    I quit playing out and playing regularly at home (drums) when my kid came along. I’d rather noodle on guitar and learn or hang with her.
     
  7. Triple Jim

    Triple Jim Squier-holic

    If you enjoy playing, it doesn't matter if you play in front of anyone, or if your wife likes what you play, you should play. If your finger is hampering your playing, it would certainly be worth consulting a specialist.

    On the other hand, if your enjoyment of playing was decreasing even before your finger injury, and you don't think it will improve, then there's no reason to push yourself. I studied classical piano for ten years when I was young. As the years went by I enjoyed playing less and less, and by the time I got to college I decided to use that as an excuse to get out. That's when I bought a guitar and vowed to never take a lesson. With each year that goes by I seem to enjoy guitar more. I occasionally play a keyboard and have fun, but I don't miss what it used to be for me.

    I'm about your age, by the way.
     
    Robb, LzeroKI, VealCutlet and 4 others like this.
  8. Dr Improbable

    Dr Improbable Squier-holic

    Age:
    52
    Apr 4, 2015
    Wisconsin
    This, right here.

    Your wife could be more supportive. To put it mildly...

    Take it easy, play as much or as little as you like. Do what makes YOU happy.

    Maybe therapy for the finger. Go slow.
     
  9. chefjeff

    chefjeff Squier Talker

    Age:
    59
    26
    Sep 4, 2019
    California
    Hey, I know how you are feeling. Take some time and let things heal properly. I have caused my left thumb to develop tendinitis from pressure due to barre chords for long periods of time.

    Repetitive strain takes it toll, but we can do some things to help get through and get your mojo back. I have found that stretching before and after helps as well as icing my thumb and wrist after playing.

    The products in the links below really have helped me and my dad with finger and hand issues as well:

    https://www.amazon.com/dp/B001OCGGEM/?tag=squiertalk-20

    https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KF8WS5N/?tag=squiertalk-20

    Take care and I wish you the best. Hopefully you keep on strumming the strings.
     
  10. JurnyWannaBe

    JurnyWannaBe Squier-Nut

    Age:
    59
    584
    Feb 14, 2019
    30808
    Trust me, I feel your pain, literally. I developed a trigger finger on my my middle finger of my fretting hand about 2 months ago. It locks up and I can't move it unless I take my other hand and physically straighten it. I'm waiting to be cleared for surgery to have it fixed. About the only thing I can do right now is run some simple scales and make some Em7 barre chords :(
     
  11. LOSTVENTURE

    LOSTVENTURE Squier-Nut

    Have you considered learning a slide style? If you've been playing for a while, it might not be as difficult as you think.
     
  12. surfrodguitar

    surfrodguitar Squier-holic

    Aug 4, 2016
    Laguna Niguel
    Playing in front or to a crowd or gig isn’t the be all end all of guitar playing. I would say for me its a small part. But I understand if you haven’t done it yet and you want to check it off your list. Don’t make a big deal about it. If you can’t fret chords right now, how about drop D?


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
     
  13. squierbilly

    squierbilly Dr. Squier

    Apr 21, 2013
    sunny phoenix
    Somebody here cut a tendon in his middle finger making it almost useless yet manages using bar chords and rhythm..
    Sounds like you can still use it for muting..
    I also like the idea of learning slide..
    Your wife believed in you or she wouldnt have urged you to go up on stage.. maybe you can find group lessons where they take multiple people and teach them together as a group.. this gives you a chance to play in front of people at a beginners pace.. I've seen these groups for ukulele and acoustic.. might be able to find a electric group or start one yourself.. if nothing else look into intermediate lessons..
    This may give you more confidence if you have a solid
    Base of chord progression knowledge up and down the fretboard..
    And finally maybe a video game like rocksmith might be right up your alley.. ive heard good things about it for a practice tool..
    And last but not least.. follow your heart.. if your heart wants to play guitar.. then you will find a way if you "Dont" give up.
     
  14. -r3-

    -r3- Squier-holic

    Jan 28, 2016
    NC Piedmont
    Paging Dr. SquierTap, paging Dr. SquierTap. @SquierTap
     
  15. John Slinger

    John Slinger Squier-Meister

    Age:
    59
    482
    Apr 26, 2019
    Greenville
    I saw Tommy Emmanuel Live Saturday night and yes definitely thought about quitting lol.
     
  16. jjudas

    jjudas Squier-holic

    Mar 23, 2016
    Metro New Orleans
    I don't play in front of people anymore and I play a lot of the same stuff over and over. All that matters is that playing guitar makes me happy. I wouldn't give up. Maybe get some therapy on your hand so you can enjoy your hobby again.
     
  17. SoundDesign

    SoundDesign Squier-holic

    Completely agree with the first part but that said, I also understand wives like this.

    There are people in this world who don't have (or feel they don't have) musical talent and would give their eye teeth to have it. As a result, they simply cannot wrap their heads around other people's modesty, shyness, anxiety as it relates to performance. If they could pick up a guitar and play and sing a song, well they just would - anywhere, any time. Except they probably don't really know what they would or wouldn't do because, well, they just don't.
     
  18. EVER THOUGHT ABOUT QUITTING?

    Fortunately … no. I have not had to deal with what you have, so I can't put myself in your shoes. Best wishes.

    My sister in laws son got frost bite as a kid, and he's adapted to playing. That was decades ago tho.
    Cheers, Barrie.
     
  19. gmt124

    gmt124 Squier Talker

    Age:
    65
    40
    Aug 11, 2019
    Wales, UK
    Know the feeling well, went to a concert of his a couple of years ago. Saw a lot of guitar players I know walking away at the end, dropped shoulders, shaking their heads in dismay! ☹️
     
  20. tuner sandwich

    tuner sandwich Squier Talker

    Age:
    44
    12
    Jul 27, 2019
    US
    I quit playing for about 25 years. I'll never make that mistake again.

    Play by your own rules. Love what you do and do what you love.
     
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